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Sunday, 07 October 2007

Run and/or Gun

why rotate the camera we have TOMBS to RAID Thanks, Crystal Dynamics!  The new Wii version of Tomb Raider Anniversary will let Lara Croft run while shootingThis article says it's a first for the series, and as far as I know, that's true.  I got out of the series early before it soured, about halfway through the second game.  Sure, the graphics improved, but I always liked the very first Lara, the one made of maybe twelve polygons.  You kids today don't realize lady archaeologists are sexier when you have to use your imagination a little.  You want her upper body to be one big shapely but immobile Lego, like she's wearing a sports bra made of cement.  Aww yeah, I'd dust that off with a tiny brush.

look out lara it's an astrolabe And now she can shoot while she jumps around.  It's funny how I expect that from every game now, except for Resident Evil, of course.  Video games have done nothing but impair my ability to kill anything in real life.  If you gave me a real gun the first thing I'd do would be to jump sideways while firing.  If you gave me another gun I'd try to fire them simultaneously in different directions.  On some deep level I'm convinced that in a desperate shootout, I could do a slow motion backflip without any loss of accuracy.  While all you people are slowly training your sights and checking your backdrops and whatever, I'll be out there mixing it up.  Sure, I'll miss you by a mile, but you'll admire my enthusiasm and spirit.  I'm like a gun toting Kerri Strug.

 

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